Friday, February 5, 2010

Unisexy!

It appears the toe-tapping Larry Craig isn't the only one who gets to have sex in a public bathroom.

The following story out of Toronto makes you want to say, "Oh, Oh, OOOOOOOOOH, Canada!"
Mildred's Temple Kitchen is inviting customers to have sex in its bathrooms."
Kind of gives new meaning to the phrase, "I'm in here!"
The Valentine's weekend promotion takes uncomfortable but electrifying sex from the close confines of an airplane and transfers it to the unisex stalls of the Hanna Ave. restaurant.
How many times have I been having "uncomfortable but electrifying" sex in the close confines of an airplane bathrooom and thought to myself, "If I could only have comfortable but electrifying sex in a public restroom on the ground?

The answer is never!

I can barely pee, pull up my pants and wash my hands in an airplane bathroom without causing a massive head injury. Besides, the smell of blue liquid is a major turnoff. It ranks right up there with roofing tar, broccoli water and stale Doritos as serious olfactory mood killers.
The Liberty Village restaurant proposes its modern bathrooms become one of the "101 places to have sex before you die.
This reminds me of that clssic Newlywed Game clip where the contestant is asked, "Where's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?" He said, "In the butt."
Toronto Public Health says as long as there's no sex in the kitchen and the restaurant keeps its washrooms clean and sanitized, it's not fussed. "As far as bodily fluids, it's pretty much similar to the other human functions going on in there," says Jim Chan, manager of the food safety program.
Similar to other human functions going on in there? Really? What kind of sick, twisted sex is Jim Chan having?

I'll never understand people who want to force their private lives on others. Can't they just stay home and have sex in their own bathrooms?

Although, it's probably the only time in your life you'll see a line of men outside a restroom.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I admit it. I've tried it. My Aunt Etta's matched knitted Toilet seat cover and Kleenex Cozy like totally ruined the mood.