Thursday, January 7, 2010

What Happens 150 Miles North Of Las Vegas, Stays...

It's a great day for women's rights! Nevada is about to approve its first legal male prostitute... for women. Not for gay guys, but for chicks! A dude who services babes for bucks! Finally, were are equal to men in every horrible, sleazy way imaginable!

My vagina is red from embarrassment.
The brothel 150 miles northwest of Las Vegas won final approval on Tuesday for its plans to hire men and start servicing women.
To paraphrase Paris Hilton, servicing is hot.
The Nye County Licensing and Liquor Board signed off on a compliance agreement that will allow for the practice to take place so long as the male sex workers wear condoms and undergo weekly health tests.
Didn't anybody on the Nye County Licensing and Liquor Board ever rent Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo?

The folks who operate the Shady Lady (what self-respecting male whore is going to want to work at a place called the Shady Lady) have the permission, now they must find the right man for the job.
Ideally, he said, they are looking for handsome men who are not too old and not too young. At the minimum, they need men who are ready to "entertain whatever lady walks in and be able to give her a fine experience," he said.
A fine experience? Hey pal, I'm not paying for a fine experience. This ain't Driving Miss Daisy!

To make matters worse, they're calling this not-yet-hired man of the night, the prostidude. Personally, I prefer TJ Hooker.

Ladies, don't do it. You don't need to pay for sex. Really, you can just stick your head outside and ask for some. The fat, tacky, horrible women on Maury all have so many lovers they need to have paternity tests done on national television just to see which one fathered their baby.

But,if you do want to pay for a fine experience make sure you give the guy Susan B. Anthony coins. I mean, this is what she marched for, right?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Here is the secret, girls, to get anything you want from a man!

Show up naked, bring beer and don't block the T.V.!