If President Obama fails to bring the Olympics to Chicago in 2016 then I think the city should stage the Obama Games instead.
Only countries headed by despots, dictators and tyrants can participate. Athletes will stay in the God Damn America Village.
Participants will compete in Synchronized Sycophants, the 100 Meter Hyperbole Relay and the Marathon Speech.
Injured athletes will be put on a waiting list and treated in 2020.
Of course, Rod Blagojevich would be the mascot. With a head that big, he wouldn't even need a costume.