Sunday, October 19, 2008

Rejected Us Weekly Fashion Police Jokes 18

I have been a Top Cop for Us Weekly's Fashion Police since 2001. (Why do men always call it "U.S." Weekly even when they see it spelled with a big "U" and a small "s"?)

Some weeks many of my jokes are published while other weeks I have to settle for just one or two. Below is a partial list of comments that never made it to the newsstand.

Note: The ones marked "Accepted" are my comments that got in. The ones marked "Rejected" are the ones that didn't.

Nicollette Sheridan

Rejected: Gold medalist in the "I'm Special" Olympics.

Rejected: Winner of this year's Whore De France.

Daniel Radcliffe

Rejected: Lawrence Welk for the New Millenium.

Rejected: I think he's been smoking too much potter.

Carla Gugino

Rejected: Please welcome the Ambassador from Bohemia.

Rejected: Free bong with every purchase.

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