Doc, It Hurts When I Do This...

I got my first ever flu shot the other day. It would have been much more enjoyable had it been a Jell-O flu shot. If the government really wants its citizens to be immunized against influenza then Jell-O Flu Shot Happy Hour would be a great way to lure in the 18-49 demographic. It could be like the old Polio sugar cube days only with vodka and wiggly red stuff.

I tried to be brave but needle stress always gets the best of me. Several minutes after receiving the vaccine I was clammy and lightheaded. I suppose the threat of Guillain-Barre Syndrome or anaphylactic shock was too much for my overactive imagination to handle.

The rest of the night I felt-- to use a medical term-- icky. The next day I felt ickier still. Last night I discovered a rash on the back of my neck that my husband lovingly calls elephant skin. Perhaps I have leprosy.

Today the area around the injection site is killing me. I feel like I did on my 10th birthday when the boys at my party held me down and each gave me 11 birthday punches (one extra for good luck). No doubt the little confused perverts just wanted an excuse to "accidentally" touch one of my newly formed boobs.

Any suffering over the last few days, however, is nothing compared to actually having the flu. Regular readers of this blog may remember that I rang in the new year from my sick bed.

We're in the staring, coughing, head-throbbing, moaning phase. We're desperately trying to force ourselves to eat. Man cannot live on crackers alone.

You don't realize how much energy it takes to keep yourself and your surroundings clean until you don't have the energy it takes to keep yourself and your surroundings clean. If we're not better in a few days, I fear we will be wallowing in our own filth. We might as well get 30 cats.

Back to bed.

Never again!