Thursday, March 27, 2008

We're Having A Hemorrhoid Party Tonight!

I was looking for the proper message technique to relieve a kink in my neck when I discovered this kicky maneuver. Can you just imagine the looks on the faces of the message therapy students when they get to this chapter? "We have to do what?" "Where?"

What I like most about Step 4 is that not only does it help with urinary retention and seminal emission but it also cures mental disorders.

If nothing else, the illustrations would make great T-shirts.

Step 4: Chang Qiang point

Midway between the tip of the coccyx bone and the anus.
Massage the point by thumb for 1-3 minutes.

Massage Therapy

Main point for hemorrhoids from excess or deficiency, anal prolapse, analfissure
Important point for genitourinary disorders, for the five types of painful urinary disorder, urinary retention, sexual exhaustion, impotence, seminal emission.
Anal Prolapse - Clonic Spasm - Consitpation - Diarrhea - Hemorrhoids - Impotence - Lumbar Pain - Lumbar Spinal Pain - Mental Disorders - Sacral Pain - Seizures - Stool With Blood - Tetany - Urinary Dysfunction

Step 5: Hui Yang point

On either side of the tip of the coccyx, 0.5 finger's breadth lateral to the posterior midline.

Massage the point by thumb for 1-3 minutes.

Massage Therapy

Resolves Damp Heat , Benefits The Coccyx , Regulates The Lower Burner , Treats Hemorrhoids
Anal and Rectal Conditions - Coccyx Pain - Diarrhea - Dysenteric Disorder - Hemorrhoids - Impotence - Leukorrhea - Lumbar And Leg Pain - Menstrual Lumbar Pain

More disturbing pictures can be found at humor-blogs.

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