Friday, January 25, 2008

Rejected Us Weekly Fashion Police Jokes 5

I have been a Top Cop for Us Weekly's Fashion Police since 2001. (Why do men always call it "U.S." Weekly even when they see it spelled with a big "U" and a small "s"?)

Some weeks many of my jokes are published while other weeks I have to settle for just one or two. Below is a partial list of comments that never made it to the newsstand.

Note: The ones marked "Accepted" are my comments that got in. The ones marked "Rejected" are the ones that didn't.

Minka Kelly

Accepted: This Friday Night Lights star just scored a fashion touchdown.

Rejected: What men want nurses to look like.

Drew Barrymore

Accepted: Modeling the Girl Scout uniforms for 2008.

Rejected: Representing the Kingdom of Slob-ovia...

Victoria Beckham

Accepted: Um, where does she plug it in when she goes out?

Rejected: Chernobyl has a gift shop?

Lucy Lui

Rejected: Not-So-Good 'N Plenty.

Rejected: From Charlie's Angels to the Andrew Sisters.

More joking at

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